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Story hits home for me

I could not help but recall a similar incident that happened a long time ago, more than 2 decades, when I read this story about a man butchering a cow in his driveway. My brother-in-law, on the way to a Christmas party at my house – well the house my wife & I were renting back then in East Hartford – came upon a lady that had hit this huge buck with her car. The thing had wrecked her car, broke all 4 legs, but not died, and neither the woman or the police officer with her knew what to do with it. My brother-in-law, and avid hunter, offered not only to shoot it for them, but to cart it off in his truck if the cop would help him drag the thing on it as it weighed over 230 pounds. He brought it straight to my place where we proceeded to hang it up, and then clean it out, in my garage. Neither of us wanted to waste all that meat by leaving the carcass around too long after a car accident.

Anyway, the week after my wife comes running into my computer room with the local town paper and the front page is a picture of my brother-in-law and me cleaning out this huge buck under the caption “evil hunter neighbors kill Santa’s reindeer and traumatize my kids”. The idiot lady across from where we lived had written a long screed about how insensitive and evil hunters would do something so nasty. Around Christmas no less, that so traumatized her little runts and left them wondering if Santa was now able to deliver their presents. My wife was not happy about the whole thing, but I had a hearty laugh about it. I joked with my other neighbors about it, and left it at that. Everyone thought she was a loon – she was always preaching her vegan ways and an avowed marxist – which always left me wondering why she celebrated a burgeous religious holiday.

I do not remember the exact details but a few months later we where at some function she also attended, and she tried to cow me for daring to hunt. “Only evil people kill Bambi!” she told some, knowing I was in ear shot. I politely ignored her until she accosted my wife, and then told her that if she didn’t watch it I would be cleaning rabbits before Easter, turkeys at Thanksgiving, and a cow before a big summer BBQ. She almost had a heart attack. Lucky for me we moved a month or so later, because I was gunning to do the cow, and I could have ended up having to deal with the hassle, like this poor dude, for doing something that isn’t illegal.

8 comments

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  1. drunkkus says:

    The downfall of all humankind will be when the last of us forgets where our food comes from. It seems to be coming pretty damned fast.

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  2. hist_ed says:

    If he shot the cow, as is indicated, then I guess he should be charged for shooting a gun in city limits, but I think the rest of the possible charges are absurd. The story admits that butchering a cow is not against the law, but says he may be charged with “disorderly conduct” because some kids because upset. That is just crap. Disorderly conduct charges apparently can be stretched to include almost anything that one or two people find objectionable.

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  3. Seattle Outcast says:

    When I was a kid the sight of a deer or five hanging in somone’s garage, carport, backyard, etc, were common.

    I can’t count the number of times I’ve helped someone kill and dress out livestock and wild game.

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  4. HARLEY says:

    This is fucking stupid.

    The man sawing at the animal’s neck, the owner of the beef, denied shooting the cow on the premises, telling the officer the animal had been dispatched outside the city limits.

    unless they have evidence that he did shoot it on site, then they got nothing on him.
    As for the neighbors, i have to wonder i any of them eat beef,and if they ever considered how that steak or hamburger gets to the table.

    Another thing, i do have to wonder about how this guy was precessing his beef, there is no mention of the beef being drawnup, or layed on a bench for quartering, or how he was moving the body, BTW they are fucking heavy when dead, me and the old man prefer using the tractor or Air hoists to do that.
    From what is inthsi story i hink the guy was half assing it, and was in for one hell of a day, if he didnt have the proper gear to quarter the beer, cut out the choice cuts, grind and saw though the bones…. he was in for a long hard day.

    Finally, there are few things better than a fresh ribeye or T-bone.

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  5. Seattle Outcast says:

    Not to mention he has to dispose of a couple hundred pounds (minimum) of guts. You gonna toss that in the dumpster out back?

    Whenever I was helping someone butcher hogs we used a block and tackle and laid the back into it. We still had a big-ass work table to use, 4 sharp knives ( and a knife bitch to keep them sharp), and a change of clothes for when we got done.

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  6. HARLEY says:

    agree, the guts stomach lungs, oh and the head, can be a pin to unload. that is unless the guy was counting on the neighborhood dogs and cats to help him…
    as for keeping the knife sharp, when working up hogs, its best to avoid cutting through the skin, that will dull a knife in no time flat.
    One nasty trick we pull on people is when we were done butchering, we would take all the bone/meat meal at the bottom of the bandsaw capture box and dump it in someones yard, that had dogs…
    The would shit like blue gooses for a few days.

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  7. sahrab says:

    Not to mention the raw hide, that alone can weigh a good chunk.

    It sounds to me like the guy has probably butchered his own deer, and figured a cow wouldnt be much different.

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  8. AlexInCT says:

    I used to take the refuse to the dump in whatever town I lived in. Cost a bit of money, but more often than not, there where people there that would actually pay you for it so they could go feed it to animals they owned. I don’t hunt much anymore because I got old & lazy, and these days I have private garbage removal. But I stress that even if all you have is private garbage removal, and anyone that does pays a hefty monthly fee for that, I expect them to haul off anything that is legal, no matter how gross or heavy. And as far as I know animal guts are not on the list of hazardous chemicals/materials that would allow them to refuse to do it anyway.

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