Best of Lee: In Their Own Words

Just to take a breather from the ongoing (but hopefully ending) nightmare, I thought I’d put up a Best of Lee. I was digging through some old posts from before the Archive Event Horizon and ran across a couple of posts from Lee that cracked me up. Don’t know if they’ll amuse you too, but we need some uplifting from recent evens.

First, on Iran’s weaving of the world’s largest rug (from a post appropriately entitled “Rug Munchers“):

Yes, my friends. In addition to oil and terrorism, Iran also contributes carpet to the world, showing us just how indispensable they are on the global stage. “Allah be praised, we will one day create a carpet so big it will smother every filthy subhuman pigdog infidel inhabitant of the Zionist entity! For while the infidel Jews may have a functioning nuclear weapon, Allah be praised, we have carpet! And a big carpet at that! And soon, when we too have a functioning nuclear weapon, we will be superior to the Jews because they will not have the carpet!”

And then this one, when Hurricane Dennis hit Cuba, possibly splashing water on some prison Qurans:

“This is an insult to Allah himself,” remarked Muhammad al Muhammad bin Muhammad Sheik Yerbouti, Grand Mufti of the Islamic Council to Prevent Desecration of the Holy Word of Allah by the Zionist Infidel Pig Dog Crusaders and Jews. “It is obvious that the forces of the Zionist infidel pig dog crusaders and Jews are conspiring to torture our blessed Islamic martyrs by soiling the word of Allah.”

Immediately the combined forces of the United Nations, the NAACP, the ACLU, the Nation of Islam, and al-Qaeda were mobilized on the communist island nation to demand justice for the incarcerated. “The Cuban people have been affected by this terrible national disaster,” shouted al-Qaeda spokesman Muhammad bin Muhammad al-Sharpton. “But that sort of flooding and loss of life is expected. It is the will of Allah. But what we are dealing with here is another kind of inhuman torture. Rainwater has defiled the sacred word of Allah almighty, and the filthy inhuman apes and pigs of the crusader Army dared to remove the droplets of water with a common paper towel without first covering their infidel hands with a surgical glove. I ask you, my Islamist brethren, when will the global community wake up to the truth of the inhuman activities that are taking place behind these walls?”

The reason these amuse me is because they sound exactly like the kind of stuff we always do hear from various and sundry nuts. Mocking fools in their own words was one of Lee’s best skills. I can only imagine what he would have made out of the Pelosi-Reid-Obama triad. We would be laughing our way through this entire ridiculous mess.

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