Tastes Like Chicken

Too many hungry mouths to feed and not enough critters to go round, the balance of life is getting pushed on it’s keester. Even with the advancing technology of genetically modified seed corn, revolutionary irrigation systems and soil preparations for maximum yield, folks still want meat and meat comes from those pesky animals that overheat the earth with their methane burps, what a conundrum.

Environmentalists want to start growing our meat in test tubes to cut down on global warming caused by cows and pigs. Others want to prevent the slaughter of animals.
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The first ‘test-tube’ hamburger is only a year away, scientists claim.

They believe the product, beef mince grown from stem cells, could pave the way for eating meat without animals being slaughtered.

The Dutch scientists predict that over the next few decades the world’s population will increase so quickly that there will not be enough livestock to feed everyone.

What immediately comes to mind is that scene in “The Matrix” where the only thing left to eat is that runny amino acid paste that if you think real hard you can delude yourself into thinking it is cream of wheat. I would like to avoid this eventuality if at all possible.

One of my favorite books of all time, passed down to my son, was Mysterious Island by Jules Verne. A group of civil war soldiers escape a prison camp in a hot air balloon but lose control of the craft and drift for days, out into the pacific and ultimately crash land on a tropical island. This island is the working experiment of one Captain Nemo who through his scientific studies has created animals that grow several times what is normal. Jules Verne was a visionary, but with seed manipulation by companies like Monsanto, seeds that will produce higher yield, more nutritious and immune from fungus and insect infestation, we are closer to this vision then ever.

Finding new ways to cure world hunger, to feed a starving planet, these are all worthy of federal funding. Lamb chops from Dolly, now that’s good eating, but don’t forget the Swedish salad.

Here’s a hint, when dining over at Kimpost’s, just go with the appetizers.

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  1. Kimpost

    Finding new ways to cure world hunger, to feed a starving planet, these are all worthy of federal funding. Lamb chops from Dolly, now that’s good eating, but don’t forget the Swedish salad.

    Here’s a hint, when dining over at Kimpost’s, just go with the appetizers.

    Hahaha. If I remember the movie correctly, that clip is of a guy trying to spice up the marriage/sex life a bit. Unfortunately the wife didn’t quite get that.

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  2. Tripper

    Are we really a starving planet though? I’ve often read that there is enough food to go around for everybody as it is, but it’s more of a political problem of getting the food to them, usually caused by the assholes who rule the regions where starving people live.

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  3. Seattle Outcast

    There is more than enough food – enough for many of us to get fat without even trying.

    The problem is, according to all the environmentalists, is that we aren’t vegetarians. Of course, if we all became vegetarians the problem would be that there are too many of us. The envirotards already have a number in mind for the ideal number of people on the planet – zero.

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  4. richtaylor365 *

    I think both you guys are right to a degree. Once the scientists start playing around with our food, they won’t be able to help themselves and inject some of their nuttier PC views into the mix, making beef more healthy (less tasty).

    But crop manipulation (increasing size, yield, nutritional value and making it more resistant to insect infestation) is a good thing no matter whether you think there is enough food or not. Sure, many despots starve their people for political effect, but if people in general could spend less time, effort and acreage, producing the food that they need, making it more bountiful for everyone, that is a good thing.

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  5. Seattle Outcast

    Speaking of less tasty, have you tried a Campbell’s soup recently? About as flavorful as cardboard, which they didn’t used to be. Talked to a friend of my wife who is a chemist in the food industry (formerly at Campbell’s) who explained how many of these companies are so compliant to whatever latest fad or “study” comes out that they mess with their product to make it so “healthy” that nobody wants to eat it.

    The crap in a can of soup is typically already processed to the point that natural flavors are gone – adding salt, fat, MSG and artificial flavor is about the only thing that makes them edible. Those are now almost completely forbidden to use per the food police.

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  6. Tripper

    The enviros won’t mind me then. I am a vegetarian.
    There’s already people who think the world is over populated but it’s probably not fair to lump them in with the environmentalists, or the misguided vegetarians who genuinely believe the reason there isn’t enough food to go around is because we feed so much of it to animals before turning them into food. That last point has been dis proven before. It is true that the majority of cereal crops grown in the US goes to animal feed, and thus there would be more cereal crops to feed to people if we ate less meat but as mentioned, there is already enough to feed to people as it is. even after feeding all the non-human animals.

    Rich, there might well be something to your idea that there will be a push to make meat ‘healthier’ if people can monkey about with the genetics of it, but what makes you think that’s confined to meat? They’ll try all the same stuff with plant based foods as well, perhaps compromising on their taste also. Given that so much of the cereal food goes to cows and chickens the focus might be on modifying the plants to make them ‘healthier’ for the cattle, and still result in the ‘healthier’ beef that you fear.

    A key difference though is that if you don’t want to eat the beef the scientists have been screwing around with can buy organic and as long as the farmers keep their heards fenced in there should be no cross contamination.
    If you don’t want to eat GM soy beans or corn, it’s a bit harder since fencing in a field doesn’t stop cross pollination.

    Too much mucking about with our plant based food could put us on the road to something like the Irish potato famine. I don’t like that idea at all.

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  7. AlexInCT

    The enviros won’t mind me then. I am a vegetarian.
    There’s already people who think the world is over populated but it’s probably not fair to lump them in with the environmentalists, or the misguided vegetarians who genuinely believe the reason there isn’t enough food to go around is because we feed so much of it to animals before turning them into food.

    Actually, the two biggest problems with food are, one, as you already mentioned, that there are parts of the world where food is used as a weapon – African nations rank at the top there – and two, that we are now wasting a ton of food items, not on feeding animals, but on bio fuels mandated and subsidized by governments. Too much corn is now being turned into ethanol for example – this heavily subsidized use pays better than growing it to feed animals or people so I am not surprised to hear that more than half of it is targeted for this use – leaving crop yields for animal and human consumption, not in the industrialized countries, but all those other countries that counted on cheap exports or handouts, woefully inadequate. The price of corn has doubled, then quadrupled, because the supply has gone down, in places like Mexico and in many of the African nations that subside on handouts.

    I am not going to argue with you about your choice to be a vegetarian. That is your choice, and nobody should have the right to tell otherwise. But human biology says you are wrong, and those that encourage more people to make that choice is something I will argue about. Want a simple test to verify humans are not supposed to be vegetarians? Look at your teeth. Then those of any herbivore (that’s the vegetarians in nature), and unless you have some seriously freaky dental issues, you will find that yours seriously don’t match those of herbivores. That’s for a reason decided by biology millions of years ago – and the primary reason, next to cooking food, that allowed humans to developed such large brains too, BTW – and one that wont change with a choice. At least you have been kind enough not to tell us to stop eating meat, and that’s appreciated.

    Back on subject. I have always laughed at people that tell us we are running out of food. Human ingenuity has allowed prosperous and civilized societies to get the food they needed, either directly from nature or by supplanting nature to speed up the process of creating more food sources, and the fact that in some places political ideology or human barbarity prevents this from occurring doesn’t mean we are running out of food.

    I can’t wait for hunting season. I am out of venison, and while these deer in my neighborhood seem to no longer fear humans to the point that they are coming right up to my deck, with people on it, to eat the buffet of expensive flowers my wife keeps planting for them, thus making it Oh so easy for me to put an arrow into one or two of them to replenish my stock, I would never admit I have done or plan to do so, out of hunting season, on the internets.

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  8. Tripper

    I am not going to argue with you about your choice to be a vegetarian. That is your choice, and nobody should have the right to tell otherwise. But human biology says you are wrong,

    Hmm, it sort of seems that you are arguing with me about it.
    The thread isn’t about that though.

    Agreed on the ethanol topic. Farm subsidies in general should be re-examined and in most, if not all cases, eliminated IMHO.

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  9. Tripper

    “Test tube meat” would in theory result in less time, effort and acreage to produce the food needed also, making it more bountiful for everyone as well no?

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  10. AlexInCT

    Tipper, not only did I not argue, but I thanked you for not being one of the vegeterians that feels obligated to preach to everyone else they should be too. I was being sincere and honestly appreciated you not telling us meatetarians how wrong we are.

    Agreed on the ethanol topic. Farm subsidies in general should be re-examined and in most, if not all cases, eliminated IMHO.

    Agreed!

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  11. Tripper

    The thanks are appreciated. I used to hate those preachy vegetarians too, still do in fact :)

    I’m just saying, you start out saying you’re not arguing the point, and then spent a paragraph explaining what is “wrong” with vegetarianism, kinda sounding like a “preachy meatetarian” if you will. If you don’t want to argue it, it would have been easiest to skip that paragraph.

    I take it it wasn’t intentional though.

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